Sports and Beer, Ducks and Tea, and Other Disasters

[00:00:00] Speaker A: Um, me. Eisler, your tv character's favorite beer. [00:00:08] Speaker B: Sports and beer, the combination that everyone now hates. [00:00:11] Speaker A: Six trends that'll define the year of 2024. [00:00:15] Speaker B: This is it's all beer. Welcome to it's all beer, the podcast that was previously all but unknown until Taylor Swift went and told her fans they should all listen, which is about to happen any minute now. I expect she's either going to tell her friends to vote or listen to this podcast, and I'm expecting the latter. I'm Jeremy Jones. [00:00:36] Speaker A: You're swifty, aren't you? [00:00:38] Speaker B: Secretly. Up until this moment, this is my coming out party as a swifty. I love all the songs she does. [00:00:45] Speaker A: Can you name two? [00:00:46] Speaker B: No, I cannot. I am pretty confident. Is that. Call me maybe. Is that her? [00:00:57] Speaker A: No. There's one that someone dubbed a goat over that is hilarious. Where it's a goat screaming and a buddy of mine in college showed me on his computer but never exited out and closed his computer and had it on full volume. Goes to his lecture in a lecture hall the next day, opens his computer, and the video starts playing in the background. Why his computer is still locked until it's just blaring. Taylor Swift. Because the goat part had already played and he's like panicking, trying to get in. Just slams his computer shut as everyone in the lecture hall is looking at him and he's just like, most embarrassing moment of my life. [00:01:41] Speaker B: You know, you might as well own it at that point in time. You might as what? What? I like a spangly singleette. [00:01:51] Speaker A: But I'm. [00:01:52] Speaker B: Tyler Zimmerman now, who's doing the long, pained introduction. How are you, Tyler? Welcome back to the beer cake. [00:02:03] Speaker A: I know it's been a minute. [00:02:04] Speaker B: Well, it's been a month, and I guess we've been off during that month. So I guess, relatively speaking, it's been in podcast time. We've only done the one episode with you not here, and after the technical issues, I'm demanding you be here every time. I'm actually got a cot for you set up. [00:02:21] Speaker A: Perfect. As long as we're doing it early enough, I can make it work. [00:02:25] Speaker B: God damn. [00:02:25] Speaker A: Having to work jobs and crotch goblins just make life difficult. [00:02:31] Speaker B: Jobs and crotch goblins. I feel like that's the title of our autobiography. I was going to say the parenting book we're going to write after all this is done. Yeah. [00:02:43] Speaker A: Jobs and crotch goblins. How to withstand the storm and keep drinking. [00:02:51] Speaker B: We'll be an inspiration. [00:02:53] Speaker A: Or child protective services will come after us. [00:02:57] Speaker B: So I brought us a couple of things there was a couple of new dark beers that we got in today that I wanted to try. This one is the Fort George Tideland stout. What do you think? [00:03:10] Speaker A: Is this that new? I thought it had been around for a little while. [00:03:13] Speaker B: I mean, new ish. It came out a few weeks ago. I finally had room in that door, so I finally got it. [00:03:23] Speaker A: No, I think it's solid. I mean, nothing mind blowing, but good roast forward, stout again. Not too heavy, not too thick. [00:03:35] Speaker B: I'm finding. I really, really appreciate a well put together stout that doesn't include chocolate or caramel or coconut, or salted caramel or fucking marshmallow. And this hips pretty good. Like a touch of carameli sweetness. Nice roasty bitter. Touch of dark chocolate. [00:03:55] Speaker A: I was going to say it's a very well put together. Just stout. [00:04:00] Speaker B: It's a stout. It's a dark beer. For those times when a dark beer just sounds good, winter is an ideal time. [00:04:10] Speaker A: I mean, it was 60 fucking degrees here yesterday. [00:04:13] Speaker B: We've missed winter by, like, we had our two weeks of winter just now. It might come back a little bit later. [00:04:19] Speaker A: Probably not. [00:04:21] Speaker B: It's Idaho. Give it a minute. It'll, like, freeze in May. [00:04:26] Speaker A: Yeah, true. [00:04:27] Speaker B: So you never know. [00:04:29] Speaker A: Jeremy, what are we starting with today? [00:04:31] Speaker B: Well, I got a couple of updates for you. [00:04:36] Speaker A: Brew dog fucked up again? [00:04:37] Speaker B: No, not this time, but give it time. [00:04:40] Speaker A: Ballast point went under again. [00:04:45] Speaker B: Probably. [00:04:45] Speaker A: But green flash is no longer a thing. [00:04:48] Speaker B: Green flash is a goddamn. It's a goddamn highlander, okay? It will never die. [00:04:54] Speaker A: All right? It's the fucking Terminator. [00:04:57] Speaker B: Whatever. There can be only one. That's Terminator, right? [00:05:02] Speaker A: No, that's Highlander. Terminator just keeps coming. [00:05:06] Speaker B: No, before we went on break, we talked about armed forces brewing out of Norfolk. I'll say it right. Norfolk, Virginia. They ran into a bit of trouble with the local city council. Go back and listen to episode. [00:05:20] Speaker A: They called it North Hulk. [00:05:22] Speaker B: Yeah, go back and listen to episode 145 for the whole story. [00:05:27] Speaker A: Oh, you actually did the homework, too, bitch. [00:05:31] Speaker B: I'm not a slack ass. I'll go back and find episode numbers. [00:05:34] Speaker A: Nice. [00:05:35] Speaker B: It's you that I have to go. I don't know what episode that was. [00:05:39] Speaker A: I just fly by the seat of my pants. [00:05:43] Speaker B: But the short version of the story is armed forces brewing is, as the name would suggest, a military tribute brewery that leans pretty hard in the culture wars. Because there's nothing that can't be made a little bit dumber if you really try. This led to the Norfolk City Council planning Commission to recommend the brewery not get licensing to open. And that recommendation went to city council, who were set to rule in December. And for some reason, it took the better part of a month for any news to trickle out. And it does look like, well, the first indication that everything was fine was I've been watching armed forces social media for the past month. [00:06:28] Speaker A: How is that the. [00:06:32] Speaker B: It's not the weirdest part of social media I have to follow. Let me put it that way. It's obnoxious. [00:06:39] Speaker A: You're already prepping yourself for the 2024 election season. [00:06:44] Speaker B: If you're not already, then you don't want to get in the middle of that and sprain an insanity muscle. Okay? You need to stretch. You need to work on that. It's a little bit like ingesting poison. You take a little bit of just pure batshit insanity every once in a. [00:07:02] Speaker A: While, because if you jump right in, you're dead. [00:07:04] Speaker B: Yeah, essentially. And next thing you know, you're in the comments section of some news site just screaming into the void. It's obnoxious. [00:07:19] Speaker A: Or you're storming the Capitol. Yeah. [00:07:23] Speaker B: It'S obnoxious. It's sometimes funny, though. Probably unintentionally on their part, but mostly obnoxious. But they were very busy a couple of weeks ago putting out a lot of stuff about how they were opening, so I figured that this was probably how it turned out. But it turns out that the city council took the recommendation and they filed it. Cinderellically. The city council approved the permit by a six to one vote. Councilwoman McLean put the words to the issue pretty well on wavy television. She called their advertising boorish and misogynistic. But, quote, that's not really the issue at hand. Ultimately, others on the city council had said some version of, if you don't like what they say, then don't go there. Vote with your wallet. But we have no reason to deny their licensing. There was some questions because, as I mentioned in the actual, when we were discussing that back in December, there is the issue that they are occupying the space previously occupied by a previous brewery, but they are planning on doubling their production, which is going to lead to increased traffic and everything else. [00:08:49] Speaker A: Every brewery that has ever opened has been like, we're going to double our production, or taken over the spot of another brewery, or like, we're going to double what they were doing. So take that with a grain of salt as well. [00:09:03] Speaker B: I was going to say, I mean, you can plan in one hand and shit in the other. [00:09:09] Speaker A: I'm going to guess you're going to need to wash one hand. [00:09:14] Speaker B: Stacey Walls, the CEO of the LGBTQ Life center, was quoted in the article saying, quote, the fact that it's being allowed means the city of Norfolk is okay having businesses that are not welcoming to everybody. Alan Biel, the CEO of the company who we talked about, responded to that in the article. Quote, we are not anti LGBTQ. We invited Hampton Roads pride people here. We invited Stacey walls from the life center to come here, and we hope they come. And you know what? So do I. I kind of would like to see what that's like. [00:09:52] Speaker A: Well, that statement right there just kind of reminds me of the time everyone knows the one person that they grew up with or went to school with that says the really fucked up, racist comment, and everyone stops and turns and goes, really? And they're. No, no, I'm not racist. I have a black friend that's saying. [00:10:12] Speaker B: Something from you, Tyler. You grew up in the northern Idaho. What is that guy like? [00:10:16] Speaker A: Oh, there's a lot of them. [00:10:17] Speaker B: I was gonna say, I feel like that'd be most of your friends in. [00:10:20] Speaker A: Northern Idaho, but there's been times in high school like someone would say something and everyone would turn and be really like. And that's when you know you took it too far. [00:10:33] Speaker B: I feel like you get that look. Quite a you. Probably not as much as you probably should. [00:10:41] Speaker A: At least I'm pretty even keel. Jeremy. I'll make a joke here and there, but nothing that crosses lines. [00:10:57] Speaker B: Another update. New Jersey finally stops fucking up news. Now, there are times when change is hard. There are times when change is easy. And there are times when you find yourself with your dick in a beehive and it hurts a lot. And you're saying to yourself, how can I make this stop? And there's an assembled crowd screaming, take your dick out of the beehive. And you look down for several minutes, and you weigh the pros and cons. And I mean pro you like bees. They make a comforting buzing sound. They make honey. Obviously, that's a good thing. [00:11:27] Speaker A: Cons. [00:11:27] Speaker B: Well, it's hard to think of anything con specific. Talk about a hummer with a burning pain that's happening in your groin. And then people gathered around you or you ask them what they should do, and they're like, for the love of God, take your dick out of the beehive. And you take that into consideration and you ruminate that over a little bit. And then maybe you muster the will, but you get distracted by a butterfly or something, and then people are screaming again and there's this intense pain you suddenly remember, and then finally, then you have the will and the strength to remove your now knobbly prong from the insect lair. And people, oh, how they cheer. That is my characterization of what the governor of New Jersey finally accomplished this week. I'm proud to say that New Jersey has successfully removed their collective genitalia from the beehive. We've talked about this a couple of times. Up till this point, we talked about how the state legislature voted unanimously to pass common sense legislation and how the governor was just standing there, oblivious to the stings on his Baldis glands. Last week, he finally did the right thing. He signed the new law into effect, removing some of the worst restrictions on New Jersey craft brewing. They can now serve coffee or soft drinks if they want. They can now talk to food trucks. That's handy. They can make some food on site if they want to, although they are not allowed to have a kitchen. [00:13:09] Speaker A: But no, that's unamerican. Talking to food trucks. [00:13:13] Speaker B: Well, all right. I can understand not wanting to talk to guys who run food trucks. That is a totally reasonable thing. I've met some of them, all right? They are, to put it mildly, flaky. [00:13:31] Speaker A: Some of the most finicky people. And then we'll be like, so if I show up, you're guaranteeing I'm going to do this much in sales? And you just want to look at them and be like, no. You're going to guarantee I do this much in sales to justify your fucking shit? Yeah, we're in the same fucking boat here, buddy. We each have a violin. If we go down, we're going down together. [00:14:01] Speaker B: What does that have to. Why the violin? [00:14:04] Speaker A: Titanic? [00:14:05] Speaker B: Well, some of them had a cello or a bass. You're just going to sit on that ship and fiddle away while the lifeboats leave going, that was a shitty beer festival. We're glad it's over. [00:14:19] Speaker A: Been to those. I can think of one in particular that was like the coupe de gras of flops. [00:14:29] Speaker B: No. Again, I understand not wanting to talk to a food truck or the operators thereof, but not being allowed to is different. [00:14:40] Speaker A: Not being allowed to means I only want to talk to those people. [00:14:45] Speaker B: You can put the football game on without checking with the state ten days in advance. I didn't know that was a thing, but it really doesn't surprise me. Although it probably has to do with how you have to register events and you're only given twelve of those per year. Every time I talk about this story, I find another restriction that just blows my mind. And the governor got what he wanted because, if you'll remember, he was withholding his signature under a conditional veto in order to get a couple of things accomplished. One that makes a lot of sense, one that fucking batshit crazy. One that does make sense. Under the new law, owners of a liquor license that have not used it in two years or more will be required to sell them. And also the law now allows alcohol sales in mall food courts. That was a big sticking point for the governor. [00:15:39] Speaker A: What I'm assuming is the governor was trying to buy a liquor license for a spot in a mall food court, but no one would sell him one. And so now it's open market, and. [00:15:50] Speaker B: I understand I would need a drink, too. Sitting in the ruins of the worst aspect of the failed dream of Americans consumer culture, nestled between a hot topic and the forever 21 and the store that sells nothing but fucking hats from sports teams for some reason. But, yes, thank God, let them have a beer while sitting in the food court. [00:16:09] Speaker A: I think it should just be open container everywhere. [00:16:12] Speaker B: That would be even better. Malls are basically health mall, school. [00:16:22] Speaker A: Church, just anywhere. Sidewalk, park, grocery store. If I want to drink a fucking beer while grocery shopping, and I'm willing to pay for it, that should be my God given right as a red blooded american. Vote Tyler Zimmerman, 2028. [00:16:40] Speaker B: Why not? [00:16:41] Speaker A: This year, I need secure campaign financing. [00:16:45] Speaker B: All right, fair enough. Well, there you go. There's yet a much better option than we were presented with. Listen, he's got a platform, and it makes sense. You can describe it to people. Alcohol, literally anywhere. [00:17:00] Speaker A: And how many american voters would be like, doesn't sound like a bad idea. [00:17:06] Speaker B: Your ideas intrigue me. Yes. [00:17:08] Speaker A: Louisiana would be like, wait, everywhere. Can't do that. [00:17:12] Speaker B: Louisiana. It's fine. We'll bring you up to speed. But I think you just announced you're running. [00:17:20] Speaker A: Am I old enough to run for president? [00:17:22] Speaker B: Not yet. [00:17:22] Speaker A: No. [00:17:23] Speaker B: 35? No, 34. You're fine. [00:17:25] Speaker A: I'm now 34. You're not. In 2028, I'll be 36. [00:17:30] Speaker B: Yeah, forget that. [00:17:31] Speaker A: You're. [00:17:31] Speaker B: That one's younger than me. Okay, then. [00:17:33] Speaker A: Yeah, I couldn't run this year even if I wanted to. [00:17:36] Speaker B: Okay, well. But there you go, everybody. Look forward to. [00:17:38] Speaker A: I like how we have an age floor but not an age limit. [00:17:47] Speaker B: But I think. I think the moral of the story is finally, I don't know if we ever determined whether New Jersey had the worst laws in the country. [00:17:56] Speaker A: No, that was Pennsylvania. [00:17:57] Speaker B: Is this still Pennsylvania or Texas? I still think we should do a survey. Like, we should almost do a debate. [00:18:08] Speaker A: Where we each pick a state, or, like, two states, and we have to debate. [00:18:16] Speaker B: Kind of a round robin scenario, just we each pick a state and defend why it has the shittiest beer laws until we finally get to. Finally get to the. [00:18:29] Speaker A: We bracket it. [00:18:30] Speaker B: Sweet six teeth. First of all, that's going to be, like, a two year project, but I'm down. [00:18:37] Speaker A: That's a lot of work. [00:18:41] Speaker B: You've never been afraid of a little bit of work? That's a lie. He's terrified of. That's why we work in the beer industry. We're terrified of actual work. [00:18:52] Speaker A: Sometimes. [00:18:53] Speaker B: But speaking of you actually having to do something, Tyler, what do you have for us? [00:18:56] Speaker A: Well, we're going to hop into the trends. Wow. My phone was just getting blown up. I've been texted by another rep to tell you hi and go fuck yourself. [00:19:12] Speaker B: Which rep? [00:19:13] Speaker A: Nathan Delgado. [00:19:15] Speaker B: Hi, Nathan. Go fuck yourself. [00:19:17] Speaker A: Welcome on the. [00:19:18] Speaker B: Welcome to the podcast Maya Friday. [00:19:22] Speaker A: Should we call him in? [00:19:24] Speaker B: He kind of did. First of all, is this our first call in on the show? And does a text count as a call in? [00:19:34] Speaker A: I mean, I can call him right now because he was trying to get me to go have a beer with him. Anywho, but vine pair put out an article talking about six stories that are going to shape the beer business in 2024. So figured we kind of hop into some of these. [00:19:51] Speaker B: Do we need beer first or time for this one? [00:19:54] Speaker A: Time for this one. Okay, so we will start with this one because it ties into one of the stories. [00:20:00] Speaker B: God help us. All right, that sound you heard is the Noka boozy iced tea being unleashed from its prison. [00:20:13] Speaker A: So the story that kind of ties into this is Boston Beer company's ability to defend twisted tea's crown against an army of challenger, the distributor that I work with in Idaho and Montana. Brought these guys to Montana first and then to Idaho. But the whole premise behind them is no carbonation. They're a hard iced tea, but they're super popular with the younger generation because they have, like, an Instagram or TikTok influencer that's real big called two turn Tony. Only reason I know, they had a fucking cardboard cut out of them at a trade show I was at. And I was like, who the fuck is that? Like, that's tutor Tony. I was like, how's it feel to. [00:21:03] Speaker B: Be an old fuck now? [00:21:04] Speaker A: Well, none of them really knew. [00:21:07] Speaker B: They were just like, we don't know either. But the kids seem to like them. It smells like peach dirt and nail polish. [00:21:17] Speaker A: So their whole stick is made worth realty. It has electrolytes. God damn it. [00:21:24] Speaker B: Oh, thank Christ. I was worried about not getting enough. [00:21:27] Speaker A: Fucking idiocracy. Gluten free, 2 grams of sugar per serving, so only 4 grams in the 24 ounce can, which isn't bad. And no carbonation. They've been kind of taking off talking to the distributor reps that I know. They only really kind of sell well around college campuses, and maybe back east they do better, but I've looked them up on social media. It seems they're starting to gain a following. [00:22:00] Speaker B: It tastes like lipton iced tea and. [00:22:06] Speaker A: Cheap vodka, which Lipton now has its own line of hard iced teas. Like, arizona has its own line of hard iced teas. When I went to buy this, it was. I think I counted, like, eight different hard iced teas outside of twisted tea. [00:22:24] Speaker B: What happened? At what point in time that we were we drinking iced tea and we thought to ourselves, you're. [00:22:29] Speaker A: This needs booze. [00:22:31] Speaker B: Shot of liquor. [00:22:35] Speaker A: College. [00:22:36] Speaker B: And then at what point in time did we become too lazy as a society to do that ourselves? Because I was in college. You get a bottle of vodka, you just throw it into whatever you're drinking. It doesn't really matter. [00:22:46] Speaker A: They did have, when I was in college, a sweet tea vodka. [00:22:51] Speaker B: Like, a flavored vodka. Okay. What was that like? [00:22:54] Speaker A: It tasted kind of like this iced tea. All right, so you pour it into some sweet tea, and then these fucking. [00:23:01] Speaker B: Kids today just don't know how to drink, like, actual booze. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'll go tell them to get off my lawn. [00:23:09] Speaker A: The crazy part is, I mean, twisted tea was kind of the grandfather of hard teas. They're still the number one, and they're basically what's propping up Boston Beer company. But with more and more people entering the hard iced tea game, the stakes are getting higher, and twisted tea holds about 90% of the hard tea segment. [00:23:43] Speaker B: Holy motherfuck, what a douche. I had to look up two Tony and wow, what a douche. Like, supreme douche. It's a guy with a six pack holding a duck for some reason. [00:24:04] Speaker A: Yeah, I never got the duck, but. [00:24:07] Speaker B: He just hangs out with. Is he just hanging out with a duck? [00:24:12] Speaker A: I don't know. [00:24:14] Speaker B: He's definitely fucking that duck. Like, there is way too many pictures of him, and that duck one is, like, perched on his little Tony right now. Okay, there is no way he is not fucking that duck. We are watching a crime in progress. This is not okay. [00:24:33] Speaker A: But I'll be curious to see kind of. [00:24:37] Speaker B: Oh, my God. [00:24:38] Speaker A: Okay, enough with two turn. Tony. Jeremy, it's an orgy. [00:24:44] Speaker B: That's him with a hot spring with a load of ducks. [00:24:49] Speaker A: I think it's technically a flock. Whatever. [00:24:53] Speaker B: At that point in time, it's a. [00:24:55] Speaker A: Harem, but I'll be curious to see. [00:25:00] Speaker B: That's going to be the picture, by the way. That's the picture on this episode. [00:25:03] Speaker A: I'll be curious to see what twisted tea is able to do and withstand with this fad and how that affects decisions Boston Beer company and dogfish head make this year. Because apparently New Belgium's hopping into the hard iced tea game. Like I said, you have Arizona Noka Lipton. Word. [00:25:31] Speaker B: Tell me he's not fucking that duck. [00:25:34] Speaker A: Why do you think he's fucking the duck? The duck is sitting on the same chair as. [00:25:43] Speaker B: Continue. [00:25:45] Speaker A: So I think that's going to be a big thing and it'll ripple into the craft market a lot more than some of these other stories. [00:25:53] Speaker B: Will, was he on the bachelor or some shit? [00:25:56] Speaker A: I don't fucking know. You know as much as I do about two turn, Tony, because it just. [00:26:01] Speaker B: Suddenly popped up with like, the Bachelor logo. And again, I'm now sort of fascinated by this fucking douche. [00:26:11] Speaker A: Duck. [00:26:12] Speaker B: Fucking douche. [00:26:13] Speaker A: Another of the stories is going to be Abi's shelf space fight between Molson Cores and Constellation brands. During Abi's fumble this summer with alienating their over vocal core customers, Molson cores and consolation were able to scoop up some extra shelf space due to the lack of sales AB was facing. So it'll be an interesting demographic to see what levels out this year. If Abi gets those spaces back or if it's still fighting to gain more shelf space or if they continue to lose more, another big one will be alcoholic monsters. Second year of sales. How does it do? [00:27:19] Speaker B: I don't know. How do you think it's going to do? [00:27:21] Speaker A: I've talked to people that are like, I thought it tasted good. I was like, well, either I had a terrible can or you have shit taste buds. [00:27:29] Speaker B: Tyler respectfully disagrees. I have a photo essay that basically illustrates that. [00:27:37] Speaker A: But we'll see. [00:27:40] Speaker B: That was the hard mountain Dew. That wasn't the monster. [00:27:42] Speaker A: Oh, yeah, the hard mountain Dew. [00:27:44] Speaker B: That was the hard mountain Dew. I have because I still have not tried the hard mountain Dew. And if the God. [00:27:49] Speaker A: The hard monster wasn't that bad. [00:27:51] Speaker B: The hard monster was not good. [00:27:53] Speaker A: It tasted like monster. Yeah. [00:27:55] Speaker B: Without any of the redeeming qualities, which is saying a lot. I mean, without the near lethal dose of caffeine and God only knows what else. All you have is a taste of an orange that should just be put out of its misery. [00:28:13] Speaker A: But monster is also trying to broaden their scope in the alcohol game and start with their own hard tea. Nasty beast. So we'll see kind of how monsters portfolio continues to expand with. [00:28:36] Speaker B: Why are you pouring me more of that shit? How much of that before I end up fucking a duck? [00:28:46] Speaker A: As it continues to expand with the help of Canarchy. [00:28:50] Speaker B: I chugged the rest of it because I didn't. [00:28:54] Speaker A: Oh, I know what you did, and I was playing into it, you son of a bitch. As well as there are some state house battles going of tax equivalency, soft to hard alcoholic popsicles and some more just like red tape beer bullshit that are going to play out with the Biden administration trying to crack down on the craft beer business for anti competitive practices with distributor consolidation as well as reining in some stuff kind of that have been operating in the gray areas with stillers trying to secure more equitable taxation, retail placements and distribution rules in 2023. And the fight still continues on in 2024. And especially with the potential legal issues facing of all these non alcoholic brands now becoming alcoholic and causing confusion potentially in the marketplace with hard mountain Dew, hard monster, hard lipton iced tea, hard everything. [00:30:26] Speaker B: Let's just get it out of our system. We need hard Capri sun. We need hard about. You're looking at me as if to say those things exist, Jeremy. Where have you been? [00:30:38] Speaker A: Hard Capri sun. Hard sunny D. Kool Aid hasn't done anything yet, but those pretty much all already exist. [00:30:48] Speaker B: How much longer until I can get fucking drunk off my ass from a little paw patrol sippy Cup? [00:30:55] Speaker A: I mean, you have a paw patrol sippy cup in your house. Okay, you could get drunk off. [00:31:00] Speaker B: When can I go to a supermarket and do that? [00:31:02] Speaker A: Probably pretty soon. [00:31:04] Speaker B: I want to suck on Chase's head and get absolutely blitzed off my tits. [00:31:10] Speaker A: Jeremy just did Bcality and underage drinking all in 1 second. [00:31:17] Speaker B: On his head. Like the little straw coming out of. [00:31:19] Speaker A: His head, not his red rocket. Yeah, but I think the biggest one for this next year is going to be watching ABMbev's progress on its rehabbing its image with its core customer. I know they're trying to do some massive changes in rehabbing the bud light image for the Super bowl commercials. They're already trying to do it now with having some of their Super bowl or with some of their NFL commercials with Travis Kelsey, who's playing in the Super Bowl. Peyton Manning, Emmett Smith. They're trying to get back to being the manly beer. So that kind of rolls into what you have, Jeremy. [00:32:02] Speaker B: Well, first of what's going to happen is I'm going to down the rest of this shit because, God, you can. [00:32:07] Speaker A: It's not carbonated, baby. [00:32:09] Speaker B: I'm aware. And so that's what's going to happen. [00:32:12] Speaker A: It's not the best, but I've had worse. It's better than alcoholic Mountain Dew. [00:32:20] Speaker B: That's fair. I have not yet had that and I guess gunned head, but that's still pretty awful. [00:32:29] Speaker A: It's got a hint of lemon, Jeremy. [00:32:31] Speaker B: That lemon did not deserve what happened to it. [00:32:35] Speaker A: Did you scan for more information? [00:32:37] Speaker B: I did not. I've got way more information than I ever wanted. [00:32:41] Speaker A: You need to scan for more information. [00:32:44] Speaker B: I will while you're talking. Next, what's going to happen if I scan that QR code? [00:32:48] Speaker A: I don't know, but I can't wait. [00:32:50] Speaker B: To hear sports and beer news. Now, in London this week, the international. I need an actual beer before I get into this. I'm going to crack. I swear to the old gods and the new tyler, if you give me any more of that garbage, people are going to be listening to a fist fight. And I don't know how entertaining that will be, but I would listen to a fist fight. [00:33:21] Speaker A: Okay. [00:33:23] Speaker B: I'm opening the wild rides. Eastern skies, Baltic Porter. Before we get into this, because again, I need something besides that. In London this week, the International Olympic Committee went to a London bar, which has got to be the most concentrated gathering of criminals in a boozing establishment since the last Guy Ritchie film. But they were there to announce that they were partnering with no less than Ab InBev to seal the first ever partnership between the Olympics and a beer company. I think IOC president Thomas Bach put the idea best, if painfully formulaic, when he said, quote, this partnership from our perspective, is the perfect match. The joy of sport and the joy of life. This wasn't the part of the story. [00:34:15] Speaker A: That caught my eye and a fat check for. [00:34:18] Speaker B: I mean, again, this wasn't the part of the story that caught my eye, though. The part of the story that caught my eye was the CNN headline that read, Olympic sponsorship deal with beer company AB Inbev criticized as cynical and an OD pairing. Here's the kerfuffle. Or the kerfuffle is presented to make a non event to seem more like an event there is in any situation, no matter how benign or even joyful that there will be someone standing nearby, not only willing, mind you, but eager to unzip, retrieve their shame sausage and take a hate waz all over it. And in this case is in the form of alcohol change UK. Or as Andrew Mistell, the director of said organization, said, quote, alcohol in the Olympics is certainly an OD pairing, given the athletes competing at this top level often do not drink alcohol as they are prepared to take part in the games. [00:35:25] Speaker A: Michael Phelps set a record for medals as he was taking bong rips. Don't try to say they're fucking holy temples. Here it is. [00:35:34] Speaker B: At this point in time, I feel I must point out that the flagship beer, the brand that will receive the most promotional time, is a new release from Ab Inbev Corona sero, an alcohol free version of corona. [00:35:48] Speaker A: Oh, I've seen that. [00:35:49] Speaker B: Because I guess there are people in this world that say to themselves, you know, corona tastes like flat, skunky donkey piss, and that's great. [00:35:59] Speaker A: And I want all the calories to that flat donkey piss without any of. [00:36:03] Speaker B: The buzz, and I don't want that nice feeling of numbing euphoria or a heightened self esteem that it creates. So if there's only a way to keep all the donkey piss aspects without any of the redeeming characteristics, that would be the beverage of choice for me, cronosero, because putting your mouth underneath a urinating donkey is a little bit on the nose. There is one exception at the zero. [00:36:32] Speaker A: Alcohol, zero donkeys, same great taste that we will admit to that you will see. [00:36:41] Speaker B: There is one exception at the 2028 games in Los Angeles. The beer on display will be Michelo Boltra. [00:36:48] Speaker A: But otherwise, because AB doesn't have corona in the United States, baby. [00:36:54] Speaker B: And you know what? I think AB and Bev has learned their lessons. Just give them whatever, whatever we have to do. And in America, just keep those idiots drunk. [00:37:10] Speaker A: Well, the Olympics are in Paris, right? Correct. [00:37:16] Speaker B: And that has a lot to do with getting into that. That has a lot to do with. Why non alcoholic? [00:37:23] Speaker A: Well. [00:37:28] Speaker B: It'S not just the Paris Olympics, but there's also a bunch of qualifying events and other things around the Olympics in and around the Olympics going into it. But this seems to stem, at least in my view, from a new wave of pearl clutching on the rise in this country and just generally of such fervor and intensity that would make Carrie nation spluch and her burlap pantaloons. It's almost a new prohibitional movement, and it's manifesting here so much that while even advertising a non alcoholic beer. What they're saying that ab embev is doing, and by the way, I'm not saying that they're not doing, is making you think about Corona since I hinted at the whole donkey piss comparison and no one would actually drink corona without the booze in there, they're really selling as Corona. In the same spirit of, like, you might remember the malt beverages in the 1990s and what have you, the captain Morgan Cola. You don't remember these for? There was a brief spirit. [00:38:45] Speaker A: I was born in 92, Jeremy. [00:38:47] Speaker B: God damn it, I forget. All right, that's the second time. All right, so there was a period in the late ninety s to the early 2000s where all the liquor companies came out with their own branded Cola. [00:38:59] Speaker A: With a mix with their. [00:39:01] Speaker B: With basically their own malted beverage, of which only Smirnoff ice still exists. And that's where we've got. Where you got icing somebody. You ever wonder why Smirnoff ice exists? No, because when you were but a young one, all the liquor companies came, there was Jack Daniels hard Cola, which actually think is still around. [00:39:23] Speaker A: Yeah, I mean, they now are partnered with Coca Cola for a Jack. [00:39:28] Speaker B: And some of actually, they all might be still around. People might be like, these are all around, you idiot. I'm like, yeah, but I only really drink beer. But there's like the captain Morgan malt beverage. They had like a cola and then, I don't know, a hard mountain dew. I think you got Smirnoff had their own thing. You had. What's the other big white rum brand has a bat on it? [00:39:57] Speaker A: Bacardi. [00:39:58] Speaker B: Thank you. Bacardi had their, had a lineup. I don't go to clubs. Fuck you. Don't give me that look. The point is you're judging me. I don't appreciate it. The point is that. The point of that all those beverages existed as a way for liquor companies to be able to advertise both in a supermarket and on television. Because in most situations you can't advertise a straight liquor. Correct. And this is like in the same. [00:40:30] Speaker A: Idea, but I mean, I remember growing up watching just straight captain Morgan ads. [00:40:37] Speaker B: But there's heavy restrictions as to when, where and how you can put those advertisements versus, say, a beer or a wine or a malted beverage. [00:40:49] Speaker A: Oh, no. I guess I grew up watching a lot of sports, so it was just free for all. Fucking. It's mainly old white dudes. I was like, beer. [00:41:00] Speaker B: But the pearl clutching has mostly to do with the fact that they look at the IOC partnering with a company that's selling alcohol. Oh, the horror. [00:41:12] Speaker A: Oh, my God. [00:41:13] Speaker B: The IOC is responsible for a lot of things. Turning a blind eye towards human rights abuses, actively boosting totalitarian regimes throughout the world, enriching themselves at the expense of host countries to the point where cities aren't even bidding to host the Olympics anymore, for roughly the same reason the Chinese put up the great wall and not a giant sign that said, welcome, barbarians. Come take all of our shit. [00:41:36] Speaker A: Or, like, countries, like, forcing the poor people to move out so they can build these stadiums that are then completely disheveled and overgrown with weeds and have been taken over by nature within two years after the. [00:41:49] Speaker B: If you haven't seen those pictures, you've really googled, they're awesome. [00:41:52] Speaker A: They're eerie. [00:41:54] Speaker B: Yeah, they're great. [00:41:56] Speaker A: I'm like, if you're trying to write a zombie apocalypse novel, just fucking follow the Olympics. [00:42:01] Speaker B: The IOC is basically a legal mafia with less scruples, but not as bad as. [00:42:08] Speaker A: And. But that saying, you're just like, you're a dictator, but you're not Stalin or Hitler. [00:42:19] Speaker B: For comparing them to the mafia. IOC is like the Corleones. They still got some honor to them versus. I can't remember the other, the five family that was getting into heroin dealing in the first movie. But my point is that the IOC is kind of the Corleones. [00:42:37] Speaker A: They got a slight, yeah, FIFA's like, add another zero to that check and you got it. [00:42:45] Speaker B: FIFA is more like, so how much slave labor will there be? I'm like, well, we actually aren't going to have them. Can there be slave labor to build the stadiums? They find the stadiums better that way. [00:42:57] Speaker A: And also it saves you money, so you can add another zero to that. [00:43:01] Speaker B: We're actually against slave labor. Oh, well, thank you for coming to the meeting. [00:43:07] Speaker A: We'll keep you in mind. We'll call you. [00:43:12] Speaker B: Exactly. [00:43:13] Speaker A: Our people will call your people. Chow. You're picking up the check, right? [00:43:20] Speaker B: To be fair, there's a lot of evidence, and mounting evidence that the benefit of booze or any perceived that might have ever existed is vastly outweighed by its downsize. Beer isn't good for you. It's a sad state of affairs, but it's not. Right now, Tyler and I are killing yourselves. Are killing ourselves. While you're listening, you're actually listening to us slowly die in front of you. Every week, year after year, we talk about booze news while guzzling the demon drink, and we are dying for your entertainment pleasure. [00:43:49] Speaker A: Even the times we do the non alcoholic ones. We're still dying. It's a slow and evident bull march to death. [00:43:58] Speaker B: I died quite a lot inside, and. [00:44:00] Speaker A: We'Re going to die a lot when Ben brings that bottle of Malort. [00:44:05] Speaker B: Not as bad as the duck fucking tea. [00:44:07] Speaker A: Oh, I will guzzle 20 of those. [00:44:10] Speaker B: Before I really need to try this malort because that was not great. I could read off all the statistics, but I'm not going to for two reasons. First, you're presumably adults listening to a podcast. Go look it up. [00:44:28] Speaker A: And also, he doesn't have them. [00:44:31] Speaker B: No, look, beer business news, as bad as it is, let's not get into that. But as you kind of pointed out, a lot of this is getting around laws restricting advertising alcohol on television and France being one of the worst offenders of this. The ban is so strong in France against advertising alcohol that the Six nations rugby Championship that was played in France and sponsored by Guinness had to replace the word Guinness on the field with greatness. Rugby, fucking rugby. Rugby is basically what happens when you turn a bar fight into an organized sport, dude. [00:45:17] Speaker A: I'm like, I'm pretty sure they're drunk on the field in rugby. [00:45:20] Speaker B: There are no teams in rugby per se. Young men in Europe just get blackout drunk for a few years, and the. [00:45:27] Speaker A: Person they hit, they're like, we're opposite teams now. And then enough of the bar does that and they're like, okay, so you're on my team, right? You hit that guy, right? Yeah, okay, yeah, we got it. [00:45:39] Speaker B: Not even that. I imagine just getting blackout drunk at a bar and they wake up a few years later on a pitch somewhere with screaming fans going, what the fuck have I been doing the past five. [00:45:57] Speaker A: Bro? [00:45:58] Speaker B: Am I now? [00:45:58] Speaker A: Really? I mean, I get you guys let titties on your tv screens, but you can't even see Guinness. Like, yeah, we got some fucked up priorities in America where we'll show a kid getting murdered on tv, but we won't show a pair of tits, but we'll at least show a beer company capitalism, baby. [00:46:22] Speaker B: We are at the logical end of civilization. I find myself wanting to defend both the IOC and yet again, AB in Bev. Again. Four years after the brood the hard way Super bowl commercial that launched this podcast out of sheer spite, I think I find myself coming to AB and Bev's defense, saying, christ on a wall hanging, just let them sell their piss water. Alcoholic or not. It's fine. It's all fucking fine. And let's not forget previous sponsors, at the level of AB InBev for the Olympics, have included Coca Cola and McDonald's. [00:47:05] Speaker A: Kill more people with diabetes than beer does. [00:47:08] Speaker B: I'm just saying the objection is like, well, athletes don't drink beer. Listen, you idiot, they aren't marketing to athletes. [00:47:17] Speaker A: They're marketing to the slob on the couch. [00:47:20] Speaker B: They're marketing to sports fans, which are the opposite of athletes in basically every conceivable sense for every one person. [00:47:28] Speaker A: I still think the Olympics and every major sport should put one regular person on the field. Just so every fat slob at home is like, who's like, I can beat them drinking a milkshake and is like. And then you see the fucking Joe schmo just getting lapped. And they're like, never mind. [00:47:51] Speaker B: For every one person performing an astounding display of athletic prowess, there are 10,000 motherfuckers shoving an entire Big Mac down their gabing ma and jumping off the couch to cheer for 1.5 seconds before immediately getting winded. Trust me, beer is the least of those guys worries. [00:48:11] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:48:13] Speaker B: Tyler, do you want to bring us home today? Yeah, actually, let's take a moment we didn't actually talk about. We were kind of sipping on the eastern skies. What do you think, Tyler? [00:48:24] Speaker A: I really like it. Just light, good representation of a baltic porter. And honestly, I forgot wild ride brewing even distributed out here. [00:48:37] Speaker B: They stopped for a minute. They were distributed by Northwest specialty. They got dropped. They got picked up by, of all people, CSB. And to their credit, they've been bringing in some of their special releases. And I'm with you. This is a very nice baltic porter. It's nice. Robust, slightly sweetness. A little bit of chocolateiness. It's got kind of a. It's. [00:49:12] Speaker A: But it's dry enough that it's not like, sweet, sweet. [00:49:16] Speaker B: It comes in at 7.3% decent. [00:49:24] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:49:24] Speaker B: That's a nice one. [00:49:25] Speaker A: Yeah. I'm impressed with wild ride. [00:49:31] Speaker B: I mean, anything would be better than the duck fucking tea. [00:49:33] Speaker A: But I've had worse. [00:49:38] Speaker B: I know. Again, I have a photo essay to prove it. [00:49:42] Speaker A: Well, we're going to introduce you to Heisler Beer. It's tv's favorite beer, but it doesn't exist. So let's kind of hop into the backstory a little bit. So if you've ever seen the show new girl, Brooklyn nine nine. [00:50:02] Speaker B: Both of my favorite shows. [00:50:04] Speaker A: Both are actually really good. [00:50:05] Speaker B: I have no idea, actually. I'm one of those weird asses that doesn't watch television anymore. [00:50:10] Speaker A: I think you'd actually really like Brooklyn nine nine. [00:50:13] Speaker B: Actually, I think I have watched that. It's like a comedy cop show. [00:50:16] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:50:17] Speaker B: Okay. I think I have seen some episodes of that. [00:50:18] Speaker A: That wasn't bad. But also in new girl, they created a drinking game that's called True American, and it's just you getting obliterated drunk. And people have pieced together the rules of the show and created. [00:50:34] Speaker B: That's a bit like, it's always sunny, that game. Okay. [00:50:42] Speaker A: But so they're crushing kaislers the whole. [00:50:44] Speaker B: Time in this essentially drunken Calvin ball. Like, no. [00:50:50] Speaker A: So, like, true Americans, like, drunken. The floor is lava. Monopoly, meet. [00:50:55] Speaker B: Sorry, that's my point. Don't you remember Calvin and Hobbes, like Calvin ball, where they. I mean, the whole. [00:51:00] Speaker A: The. [00:51:01] Speaker B: The whole point of Calvin Ball was you're just making up the rules as you go. [00:51:04] Speaker A: Yeah, basically. [00:51:05] Speaker B: All right, so it's drunken Calvin ball. [00:51:07] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:51:08] Speaker B: Okay. That's where my frame of reference is. Do you mean like a comic from the 1980s? And, Jeremy, we mean that. [00:51:15] Speaker A: Yes. But this is kind of a crazy story of this beer brand that doesn't exist and has earned the nickname of the Bud light of fake beers. [00:51:37] Speaker B: We're talking about Bud light everywhere, as in, like, bud light popularity wise, or Bud light. We're having some problems with it right now, popularity wise. [00:51:47] Speaker A: Cool. So it was created in the mid 1990s by independent studio services. It's a California based prop supplier that creates onset brews for use in film and tv. The big challenge a lot of companies, like production companies have ran into is usually if they're doing a scene that involves the need for beer or alcohol, it's in an overconsumption manner or in a situation that paints the brand in a bad light. And so these big brands that would normally be like, yeah, use our shit are like, nah, we don't want to be a part of it. [00:52:32] Speaker B: The great irony is that the producers of alcohol generally frown on what happens when you consume their product in large amounts. [00:52:42] Speaker A: Yes. Except when they see the sales of it. [00:52:45] Speaker B: Oh, no, they love the sales of it. [00:52:46] Speaker A: Yeah, but when you're filming that, they're. [00:52:50] Speaker B: Like, listen, they just want the money. They do not want to be culpable for the jail time. [00:52:59] Speaker A: Underage drinking. [00:53:01] Speaker B: They won't be culpable for the jail time, the Harmed children, or the blown up animals. [00:53:09] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:53:12] Speaker B: Just the money. [00:53:14] Speaker A: But since Heistler doesn't exist, they don't need to worry about outside sales. They created this brand. [00:53:23] Speaker B: It's better than just what they used to do back in the day, which. Where they had, like, a bottle with. [00:53:27] Speaker A: Just beer written on it. [00:53:28] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:53:31] Speaker A: And that's kind of the joy of it. So new girl is probably the most revolent show that features it. The show purchased about 1000 cans and bottles of the beer during its run. Wow. Oh, I mean, one of the characters in it's a bartender and so he's always drinking it or passing it out at the bar and it's always label out. Like, I've never seen a bartender hand out that many beers. Proper label out. [00:54:03] Speaker B: Here's your duck fucking beer. Yeah, I'm not over the duck fucking yet. [00:54:10] Speaker A: So it originally debuted in 1997. Would you like to take a guess at what film I do? [00:54:18] Speaker B: Not again. I just demonstrated my cultural references. [00:54:22] Speaker A: Where? Card counting movie? Tom Cruise. [00:54:26] Speaker B: I don't know. [00:54:27] Speaker A: The Rainmaker. [00:54:29] Speaker B: Okay. I've never actually seen that movie. [00:54:32] Speaker A: Wait, that might be different. I think that was Rain man. [00:54:35] Speaker B: That's Rain man? [00:54:36] Speaker A: Yeah. The Rainmaker is the first movie that it initially. [00:54:41] Speaker B: What's a Rainmaker? [00:54:43] Speaker A: I don't know. I caught myself. [00:54:48] Speaker B: I love most of it because that also occurred to me, like, that's not. You mean Rain man? Yeah, I love that you're like, oh shit, I just stepped in my own. [00:54:58] Speaker A: Fuck that one up fictional brand. My bad. [00:55:03] Speaker B: And you were ready to move on past it. And I appreciate that we have to stop and talk about how you fucked that up. [00:55:10] Speaker A: So initially debuted and the flagship for the brand was Heisler golden ale, but has since expanded to include Heistler Light and a vintage Heisler label taking place before the 1980s. Since its founding, the fake beer is brewed by a fictitious brewery called Bilson Brewing Company in Sun Valley, USA. [00:55:41] Speaker B: Sun Valley, Idaho. How many Sun Valleys are there? [00:55:46] Speaker A: That's kind of what I thought I was like. [00:55:48] Speaker B: Or this like a Springfield of Simpsons kind of thing. [00:55:51] Speaker A: I think it's kind of like Springfield. [00:55:54] Speaker B: Springfield that exists. I mean, it is basically the quantum city of America. It both exists and doesn't exist. [00:56:03] Speaker A: It's kind of like why they called nightmare on Elm street nightmare on Elm street. Because every town has an elm street. [00:56:10] Speaker B: Yeah, fair enough. But does every state? I mean, if you're going to choose a generic name for a city in America, it feel like it'd be like. [00:56:18] Speaker A: I'm sure the creators of this had been to the conference, the tech conference in Sun Valley and were like, sun Valley. I don't know any towns like that. Fuck it. Let's call it Sun Valley. Who will know? [00:56:32] Speaker B: I feel like there's only one Sun Valley. When you say Sun Valley, you go, you mean Sun Valley, Idaho? [00:56:37] Speaker A: Which is not even a real place. It's the resort, right? [00:56:40] Speaker B: Yeah. Again, if you're going to pick a city name, what's a common city name? Don't think about that for a second. [00:56:53] Speaker A: So it's a german inspired red and gold label can, and has a red and gold label and can be spotted on cans, bottles, tap handles. It's featured in it's always sunny in Philadelphia, parks and recreation, criminal minds, the social network. [00:57:12] Speaker B: What point in time was it featured in? That's the last show I watched with any regularity. Was it's always sunny. [00:57:18] Speaker A: I don't know. I'm sure if you look it up, you can find. But homebrew people have figured out what the closest lookalike would be and created recipes that they've posted to brew your own magazine. [00:57:36] Speaker B: Sorry, I had to look this up. Fun fact, the two most common city names in the United States is Fairview and Springfield. [00:57:46] Speaker A: There we go. [00:57:47] Speaker B: Sorry. [00:57:49] Speaker A: Here is the homebrew recipe for Heisler. [00:57:52] Speaker B: Holy shit. Okay, so it includes, well, eight pounds of two row pale malt, a little bit of munich, which. A little bit of Munich Vienna. So it's got a little bit of roasty doughy, like, biscuity sweetness, a touch of melanoidin, which is interesting because that'll add a little bit of the milliard reaction to it, and a touch of chocolate malt, which makes it like an. [00:58:20] Speaker A: Amber, I think, if I remember, it's kind of like amber lager, amber gold ale. [00:58:27] Speaker B: But I feel like with a half an ounce of chocolate malt in a five gallon batch, you're going for, like an amber. [00:58:34] Speaker A: Yeah. And it's been a while since I've watched a show that has had it where it's actually poured out. But it is. So they do a non alcoholic brew in the bottles and cans. So that way, if they pour it into a glass, it looks like an actual beer. [00:59:00] Speaker B: There is something in those bottles. [00:59:02] Speaker A: Yes. They did say if the production company lets them know that it's not being poured into any glass, they'll fill it with water or soda, whatever the company wants them to fill it with. [00:59:16] Speaker B: Handy. [00:59:18] Speaker A: But there's a whole fandom. [00:59:23] Speaker B: Oh, my God. Wait, hold on. Go back. Where does it say that? Sun Valley. [00:59:29] Speaker A: Sun Valley, USA. Just. [00:59:31] Speaker B: Sun Valley, USA. It's beautiful. Okay. Featured in Malcolm in the middle and several other television. [00:59:37] Speaker A: So I was going to run through some of the shows that feature Bilson beer. Malcolm in the middle features Bilson. But if we go down to Heisler, which is. That's what the label looks like. Yeah. Three. The Dale Earnhardt story. American pie presents bandcap beer fest. Blue Mountain State, Brooklyn nine nine, burn notice, Chicago PD, criminal mind, CSI, CSI Miami. Desperate housewives. I'm just skipping through a bunch, potentially looking for any big names that people would know. How I met your mother. [01:00:33] Speaker B: What I'm learning is, like, every show. [01:00:35] Speaker A: Produced after, like, 2000, it's always sunny in Philadelphia. Key and Peele, the league, Longmire, Malcolm in the middle. My name is Earl Parks and Rec, prison break, Reno 911, Roseanne Scream, Star Trek Enterprise. Wait, what? Are they drinking beer on Star Trek? I don't know. I've never seen it. [01:01:17] Speaker B: And they have the replicator. [01:01:19] Speaker A: You don't need to have a stealing Harvard. [01:01:21] Speaker B: No, you don't need a brand for Star Trek. [01:01:23] Speaker A: The social network, super bad. [01:01:25] Speaker B: You don't need to have a brand on Star Trek. They just have a replicator training day. [01:01:30] Speaker A: You just put two and a half. [01:01:31] Speaker B: Men, put your glass underneath the replicator. Tyler Perry's house of pain, and it pours a beer. You don't need a brand name for that. In fact, brand names would be workaholics, white collar, the antithesis of. [01:01:47] Speaker A: What the. [01:01:48] Speaker B: Star Trek society would be about. Because at that point in time, they've actually transcended capitalism in all its forms. Which is interesting, because I feel like Star Trek is held up as the ideal society of pretty much everybody. And everybody thinks that their ideology is how we get to the Star Trek future. But they're both. [01:02:09] Speaker A: That's it. In Star Trek Enterprise, they have cans of beer. [01:02:13] Speaker B: In Star Trek Enterprise. I like how that long pause. Because at that point in time, I was just making stuff up because I thought it would be kind of funny for me to be ranting on about Star Trek while you were still saying, be like, no, no, I'll find this motherfucker. [01:02:27] Speaker A: So, fun fact, Heisler beer is the most used beer brand prop in live action television. [01:02:36] Speaker B: I mean, yeah, beer makes things happen, and movies are about things happening. [01:02:44] Speaker A: So, although not an exact match, there is a Bilson brewing in Beechworth, Australia. But, yeah, next time you're watching one of your favorite shows or movies, keep an eye out for that bright red label. Really? It's red with kind of the brown doily style background. It says Heistler. And if they're drinking a beer, you're probably going to see that. If that show has been produced past the late 90s, does anybody in any. [01:03:22] Speaker B: Of those shows request a Heistler beer? Like a Heisler, please. [01:03:27] Speaker A: No. [01:03:29] Speaker B: They say, yeah, beer. [01:03:30] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:03:32] Speaker B: Interesting. [01:03:33] Speaker A: At least I haven't seen all the. [01:03:36] Speaker B: Shows, so maybe if anybody actually requests a Heistler. [01:03:41] Speaker A: So if you've seen one of the shows that has Heisler and they're like, I'll take a Heisler. Let us know. [01:03:49] Speaker B: Tyler, you have anything else to add before. [01:03:54] Speaker A: Uh, if you're going to be over in Astoria, Oregon, the festival of the dark Arts is getting ready to happen. So it's a big barrel age festival kind of throughout the town. Over, I want to say, February 27. [01:04:12] Speaker B: Are you going there? Is that where you're bringing it up? [01:04:14] Speaker A: We will have beer there, but I will not be there. [01:04:17] Speaker B: But you can get some beer there. This has been. It's all beer and duck fucking tea, apparently. [01:04:26] Speaker A: Did you scan the QR code? [01:04:28] Speaker B: Okay. All right, let's do this right? And then in the last several seconds, let's scan the QR code. If you want, you can get a hold of us. We put things up on Instagram. Maybe whatever comes up on this is going to be Instagram worthy. Noka boozy bevies. It just is. [01:04:49] Speaker A: Just their website. [01:04:50] Speaker B: I mean, what do you think it was going to be? [01:04:52] Speaker A: I didn't know. I was really hoping it was going to be two turn Tony, just to really just send you over the edge. [01:05:00] Speaker B: Him finally going, yeah, I fuck ducks. Yeah, this is my duck. And you know what? [01:05:07] Speaker A: These are my six duck wives. [01:05:08] Speaker B: And you know what? I do not fuck the duck. I make love to the duck. Okay. It is a tender, beautiful moment, and I would appreciate you not cheapening it. [01:05:18] Speaker A: Why? Making love to one the other nibbles on my nutsack. [01:05:24] Speaker B: There's a store locator, an anti drinking drink merch thing. Order online, text us our story. What's the anti drink and drinking merch? Yes, I'm 21. Anti drink and drinking club. There's a shirts that say anti drink and drinking club. I guess that's their clever way of saying, yeah, we drink. We're a drinking club. Against anti drinking. No, I guess you're the drinking club. [01:05:59] Speaker A: For the anti drinkers. [01:06:00] Speaker B: For the anti drinkers. Which actually is a pretty good summary of this iced tea. Because if that was my first exposure to what alcohol was, then I'd be like, I'm good. [01:06:16] Speaker A: Anyway, I'm so glad I brought that to just punish you. [01:06:22] Speaker B: You're only pissed off that you haven't brought in the hard mountain dew for me to experience. [01:06:28] Speaker A: There's still time. [01:06:31] Speaker B: For the moment, I think it's got to be on its way out. You can get a hold of it. So on Instagram, you can see what we've been drinking, and I put up some random stuff on there, and it makes our way to our Facebook page. You can send us an email. It's [email protected]. And you can subscribe to our podcast on iTunes or on Google Play. And someday I'm going to figure out where the other. There's like, two more podcast platforms are out there that someday I'll write them down and bring them because I know. [01:07:04] Speaker A: Stitcher is no longer. [01:07:05] Speaker B: Stitcher is no longer, but it was. [01:07:06] Speaker A: One of those things like, Google podcast is closing. [01:07:09] Speaker B: All right, then just fucking iTunes. [01:07:11] Speaker A: I guess it's going to be YouTube podcast now. [01:07:14] Speaker B: Oh, God damn it. Well, okay, that's fine, except we don't have a video on that anyway. The point is that there's probably a place you can subscribe to this. And if this has caught your interest and you're not already a subscriber, you should probably do that. [01:07:30] Speaker A: And just subscribe to us on whatever platform you found us on, because you're already listening. [01:07:36] Speaker B: You found us somehow, and that'll be quite enough from us. I'm Jeremy Jones. [01:07:39] Speaker A: I'm Tyler Zimmerman. [01:07:41] Speaker B: I'm gonna drink anything but this goddamn noka. [01:07:44] Speaker A: Have fun.