[00:00:09] Speaker A: Tennessee wants to get rid of cold beer. I'm sorry, I thought this was America.
[00:00:13] Speaker B: A walkout threatens your favorite shitty beer.
[00:00:16] Speaker A: Craft beer still does the most corporate thing ever.
[00:00:20] Speaker B: This is. It's all beer.
[00:00:25] Speaker A: 30.
[00:00:29] Speaker B: Welcome to it's all beer beer news were contained in a massive 30 barrel fermenter. We are the valve that's about to fail spectacularly and knock you over with a sheer volume of information to the light of the entire Internet. I'm Jeremy Jones.
[00:00:43] Speaker A: I'm Tyler Zimmerman. I mean, that is a good description, especially because we both came with a good amount of stories.
[00:00:52] Speaker B: Like, so you saw that video?
[00:00:56] Speaker A: Seen. I don't know if I seen the video you're referring to. I've seen videos of valves getting broken off by forklifts or this is failing.
[00:01:07] Speaker B: This is one of the most spectacular ones. I first saw it appearing on the usual. There's like a couple of Instagram accounts that are basically beer fails security footage at breweries going terribly wrong. But this one actually made the news because the valve failed. Beer shot out of the fermenter so hard that it knocked the worker back off his feet. He scrambled up, and then is like, trying to.
[00:01:38] Speaker A: There's no way to stop it. And then you notice, I was going to say every video I've ever seen like this, you see him attempt to fight back, and then you see the look of defeat come across their face as they step to the side and just watch the beer slowly pour out.
[00:01:56] Speaker B: The video didn't get to the resigned portion of it, but there is a state. It's amazing. And by the way, if you're at all in the industry, you've probably been involved in some mess. And there is, like, this instinct to try to fix it, try to stop it, but eventually your brain just kicks in. You're like, it's hopeless, man. Just let it go.
[00:02:23] Speaker A: I still remember the time when we were working together at the shop and I finished cleaning one of the lines, and I was getting ready to put the faucet back on, and you coupled the fucking keg, and I got sprayed with grapefruit IPA from laughing dog brewery.
[00:02:44] Speaker B: Good times. Good times.
[00:02:45] Speaker A: And I was like, Jeremy, just holding my hand over the hole, getting sprayed.
[00:02:56] Speaker B: This video was like, go look it up. This video is like, I don't know what the guy was doing, but all of a sudden something fails. Beer shoots out of that. He gets blasted backwards. He scrambles to his feet and then, yeah, tries to adorably stop the beer.
[00:03:11] Speaker A: I'm like, you're not good.
I also love watching the ferkin fails, where they don't hit the faucet in hard enough, and it shoots out, and then they try to shove it back in, but it's just spraying beer everywhere.
[00:03:27] Speaker B: What are you drinking today?
[00:03:29] Speaker A: Well, I am drinking the milange from Fremont Brewing. It's their 2023 release. It's a barrel age. Cuba just says an exclusive blend of barrel age spiced out, and Porter comes in at 10%.
[00:03:50] Speaker B: Damn. So, hitting it hard tonight.
[00:03:54] Speaker A: Yeah, well, I saw it. It's from October, but I was like, I never saw that before.
[00:04:00] Speaker B: Saw it, either.
[00:04:02] Speaker A: So you should really talk to your rep who distributes Fremont.
[00:04:08] Speaker B: I would love to.
You and I will talk about that.
[00:04:18] Speaker A: Yes. Yes, we will.
[00:04:20] Speaker B: I got myself the revision. There's people wondering, what the fuck are they talking about? It's a. Thanks.
[00:04:25] Speaker A: Don't worry.
[00:04:26] Speaker B: Don't worry about it. The revision. Cross pollination.
A collaboration that revision did with someone I've forgotten. This is going to be a great episode. I keep on words just leave my brain. Great basin.
[00:04:44] Speaker A: Is it bad that I forgot both of those were still even around?
[00:04:47] Speaker B: Revision and great basin.
[00:04:50] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:04:50] Speaker B: How do you forget? You know, revision is still around.
[00:04:54] Speaker A: Yeah, but I couldn't tell you what a recent beer of theirs is.
[00:05:01] Speaker B: Yeah, you could. They're kind of on rotation. They got social fermentation. They've got disco ninja. They've got this one. Cross pollination. There you go. Now, you got, uh. It's a hazy ipa. And I picked this up because we'll be talking about hazy ipas soon enough. But before we get into that, Tyler, do you want to start us off tonight?
[00:05:27] Speaker A: Yeah.
A republican lawmaker in Tennessee is trying to take all that is good and holy out of America and just take a staple out of the american beer culture.
Ron Grant is the main sponsor of a bill going through the Tennessee House of Representatives that has been dubbed the cold beer ban. It's made national headlines. And while the final version of the bill is still being drafted after the blowback, it is not going to include any language now that prevents the sale of cold beer. Originally, when this bill was proposed, it was going to ban the sale of cold beer in an effort to discourage drinking and driving and not like drinking and then driving, like drinking while driving, I assume.
[00:06:24] Speaker B: When they say we're banning cold something, I think, correct me if I'm wrong, but they're talking something similar to Indiana's law or what Indiana's law used to be. I haven't checked up on it recently, but at some point, in time. I mean, you can buy cold beer like you can buy cold draft beer, but if you go to a supermarket or a gas station and find the beer section, it's sitting there on the shelf just at ambient temperature. Is that what they're correct? Okay.
[00:06:54] Speaker A: Yep. So his original idea would have banned refrigerated beer from being sold in gas stations and retail store.
Fellow Tennessee lawmakers called him out on social media.
[00:07:07] Speaker B: That's a. Yeah.
[00:07:10] Speaker A: Oh, one of them goes, thank you all. Have a good weekend. Have a cold beer on me, said John Ray Clemens, a democratic House caucus chair.
And then another. The lieutenant governor of the state said, next they'll be outlawing hot coffee. I guess.
[00:07:29] Speaker B: That is a giant gift to anybody that's either running directly against them or running on the opposing ticket, because that's.
[00:07:46] Speaker A: But for Ron Gantt, he said his desire was simple. It's to eliminate the temptation of driving drunk. He said, why do we make it so easy for the bad actors to have access to alcohol?
[00:08:06] Speaker B: He's aware you can drink it if it's not cold, right.
[00:08:09] Speaker A: Well, I'm like the people that are willing to drink a beer driving down the road are the bad actors you're referring to. Do you really think it being cold or warm is going to stop them also?
[00:08:25] Speaker B: I don't know. Tennessee, all right, but I can make some inferences. But how many people are getting pulled over in Tennessee while actively drinking a beer in the driver's seat? Usually it's just somebody coming home from the bar with a few, too.
Some. It's a ballsy move to be chugging while driving and to be caught doing that is something so stupid, I assumed it didn't happen outside of Texas.
[00:08:57] Speaker A: Louisiana, it is legal to drink a beer while driving as long as you're below the legal limit.
[00:09:03] Speaker B: Used to be legal in Montana, too. Actually, until I believe, like 2000, the.
[00:09:08] Speaker A: Cows voted against it.
[00:09:11] Speaker B: The what?
[00:09:13] Speaker A: The cows voted against it.
[00:09:16] Speaker B: It was fairly recent that it was perfectly legal. Again, as long as you were under the legal limit, you could be driving down the road in Montana drinking a beer.
[00:09:29] Speaker A: But he was doing this. One of the main reasons is he got hit head on and almost killed two years ago by an alleged drunk driver.
So he's kind of guy actively drinking.
[00:09:45] Speaker B: A beer at the time, though.
[00:09:47] Speaker A: I don't know. That's all the article said.
[00:09:49] Speaker B: Fair enough.
[00:09:51] Speaker A: But he is still trying to curb the drunk driving while not curbing your access to a cold sixer.
He came out to say, I do not want to infringe on law abiding citizens or be unfair to businesses.
So you're not going to pass this then?
[00:10:14] Speaker B: You weren't going to anyway.
[00:10:16] Speaker A: Yeah. His other proposals now include a deep study into drunk driving statistics.
The language of this bill would require the Tennessee impaired driving council to develop a comprehensive report along with recommendations to combat the increase in drunk driving fatalities that the state of Tennessee has seen.
Alcoholic Beverage Commission would also release a report about alcohol and its effect on Tennesseans. And they would work with law enforcement to streamline responses to fatal crashes involving alcohol and trace where the offender obtained their alcohol from. And if there are frequent offenders of this store has sold to x amount of drivers getting drinking and driving, they could potentially lose their liquor license or limit the number of drinks someone could purchase at a bar. If you don't prove you have a sober ride lined up.
[00:11:34] Speaker B: All those. Fair enough, I suppose. And a lot more effective, I should think, than we're just not going to keep the beer cold.
That'll teach them like anybody's going to go, I was going to drive down the street about 100 mph while chugging that, but it's warm.
[00:11:51] Speaker A: I guess I'll just go with the fifth of whiskey that I can drink neat.
So Jeremy, you got anything better than trying to get warm beer?
[00:12:07] Speaker B: Not really. No beer, no work news. Now wait. Shit. Flip that. Okay. This week, 400 teamsters at the Molson Cores brewery in Fort Worth walked off the job. It started on Saturday and it took our jobs. No, they just walked off with the jobs.
Nobody's doing the job.
[00:12:25] Speaker A: They stole our jobs.
[00:12:27] Speaker B: There's just nobody's doing know. There's not a lot of striking going on in northern Idaho, is there?
Actually, I read, actually it turns out northern Idaho has a very interesting socialist history. But long story short, look up the Dynamite Express.
[00:12:54] Speaker A: All right?
[00:12:55] Speaker B: And I think his name was Big Bill Hinckley.
Some little nuggets of Idaho lore. But anyway, it's neither here nor there precludes the official strike deadline that's looming on March 1 that's likely to affect not only most of Molson Corps, but also Anheuser Bush. The latter strike, the one against Anheuser Bush is the union says was pretty much unavoidable at this point. This comes at a time when Molson Cores especially, has been reporting record sales and profits. Last week it reported 1.5 billion profits in 2023, up 29% from a year earlier.
Oda quote, CEO Gavin Hatzerley quote, Last year we achieved the highest reported top and bottom figure in the history of our company, which is great until your workers are looking at your quarterly earnings and their paychecks and they're seeing one skyrocket and the 1 request for money.
[00:13:58] Speaker A: Flatter than fucking Kansas.
[00:14:02] Speaker B: Your requests for money get met with faraway stares and vague statements about profit margins and market returns and transistential flea booties, along with the assertion that those are all real things that they need to be concerned about. They just keep talking until their eyes are open back into the head and you go away.
In light of record profits, the union claimed that the company's offer was insulting, offering less than a dollar an hour wage increase for the workers. Sean O'Brien, the teamster's president, said, and I like the fact that this is between a man named Sean O'Brien and Gavin Hattersley.
[00:14:45] Speaker A: One is like the most poor irish drunk name and the other is the most like white collar trust fund baby white guy name.
[00:14:58] Speaker B: Sean O'Brien said, quote, as long as the profits keep flowing to the top, Molson Corz doesn't give a damn if the workers inside his breweries can afford to take care of their families. Millions go to the CEO, billions go to Wall street, and a middle finger goes to the workers.
It's a great quote, I thought.
[00:15:14] Speaker A: Welcome to beer.
[00:15:16] Speaker B: So you might be asking yourself, what does this mean? Am I going to be able to get my 30 rack of Miller light tomorrow? Well, first, my solidarity with the workers. I'm sure your corporate masters appreciate your commitment to self centered consumption. And second, yeah, actually it's probably not going to lead to many disruptions at all. Of the 30%, or only 30% of Molson Corps's workers are union, and most of those are at the three canadian facilities.
The article didn't mention exactly how many workers are union, specifically in the United States, but it did mention that it operates six breweries in the country and there is capacity to spare those other five breweries. And they've been building up inventory in the likely advent of a strike, so they're sort of prepared for this.
In a company statement, Molson Cores said, quote, while we respect the union's right to strike, we have a strong contingency plan and are well equipped to ensure consumers will be able to buy their favorite Molson Kors products.
He added that the offer they gave the union, quote, exceeds local market rates. When asked with a going rate for self important chairfielders named Gavin, the CEO promptly shoved a fistful of money in his ears and said, la la. I can't hear you. I'm big man very important with money in ears. I made that last point, but the point stands.
Every big beer company is run by a man with a douchey name. That's what I'm learning.
[00:16:53] Speaker A: Because it's all upper class white dudes.
The only thing worse than white people cooking 90% of the time is their naming abilities.
[00:17:04] Speaker B: So, yeah, come next week, it could get interesting in the macro world.
Tyler, what's next?
[00:17:15] Speaker A: Well, Jeremy, we're going to hop into keep it kind of corporate esque with corporate non competes.
Typically when you think of a non compete, you think of lawyers, doctors, just big business, big corporations. But this is something that's kind of stuck around in the craft beer industry from the get go and hasn't really gone away.
It's an article by Vine Pear called when brewers enforce non competes, everyone loses. And the main thread in this is kind of the biggest offender in this of being overly aggressive with their non competes of Boston Beer company.
[00:18:07] Speaker B: What? Who knew a company founded with Enron money would be doing something shady and, well, corporate.
Yeah, they're founded with Enron money. Look it up, people.
Sorry.
[00:18:20] Speaker A: We know.
So the article starts off talking about how back in 2011, Anchor Brewing and Boston Beer Company got into a spat and legal conflict because Anchor hired former Boston Beer company sales representative to manage its distributors in northern California.
Boston Beer Company then sued the employee and Anchor brewing the following day that the house that Sam Adams built had taught said rep everything he knows about the beer business and it was going to cause them detrimental harm for him going to work for Anchor. They eventually settled it out, of course, but the anchor CEO at the time did release this statement. For more than 40 years, Anchor Brewing has set the standard for open and collegial collaboration among the fraternity that is american craft brewery.
Anchor finds it ironic that Boston Beer fills its training is so special and unique.
They must have short memories of the time they spent here at anchor brewing gaining firsthand knowledge of how craft beer was working when they lost.
[00:19:50] Speaker B: It's rough when shit like that comes up.
[00:19:54] Speaker A: Oh, yeah.
But some time has passed since then and really not much has changed kind of on the Boston beer company trying to enforce non competes. They're one of the few breweries that actually make their employees sign a non compete, whereas like the major players of Anheuser, Bush and Molson cores only make their higher level employees sign non competes.
Boston Beer company it is. Everyone has to sign a non compete. It's a one year non compete in the industry. So you have to take a full year off of working in beer. If you decide to leave Boston Beer Company, they're currently being sued by a couple former employees, as well as currently suing some other employees.
[00:21:03] Speaker B: Going the full stone brewing on the world, are they?
[00:21:08] Speaker A: Yes.
And with this, a couple of the former employees.
One is claiming that because he had to take a year off out of the craft beer industry, he's not able to get another job because the industry has continued to develop without him there and is not able to get hired back into the industry at a livable wage. And so he now has to look for a job outside the industry with this.
There's a couple of people in this article that they actually interview with professors that are experts in this field, and they bring up how the whole defense of this helps protect customer goodwill and protect confidential information is basically just one giant croc of horseshit. No.
[00:22:16] Speaker B: Do tell.
Wait, are you cynically suggesting this is just a ploy to enforce their will on employees that find they have, will have little recourse to even quit and have to leave the industry altogether? That way they can kind of do whatever the fuck they want in the first place? I'm shocked. This is my shocked face.
[00:22:39] Speaker A: Yeah.
And also it does. In a recent survey, most Americans, 66% to be exact, support the federal trade commission's proposed ban of non compete agreements across the country.
[00:23:00] Speaker B: I think I saw something that said only, like, 70% of people like pie. So that's what we're talking about here.
That's essentially a consensus.
Yeah, that's essentially everybody except for the really weird.
[00:23:29] Speaker A: So Evan Starr, who has his phd and is an assistant professor of management and organization at Robert H. Smith School of Business at the University of Maryland. God damn is that name any longer than it fucking felt like I was reading a Woodland empire beer name, like, from three years ago.
[00:23:55] Speaker B: I miss it.
[00:23:56] Speaker A: I mean, am I wrong?
[00:23:58] Speaker B: No, you're not wrong.
[00:24:02] Speaker A: So he goes on to say, the covetous corporate guarding of secrets, real or imagine, hurts both the employees and the employers.
And the evidence points in the direction that the firms are made worse by having the non compete.
They impose higher hiring cost on everyone. So what happens is basically the companies that are doing that get stagnation, where the workers are not sorting to their best jobs unless happy workers are less productive.
So being stuck somewhere because you like working in that industry, but if you'd have to take your non compete, basically lead to more dissatisfied workers, less creativity happening, less results happening, and a more struggling business.
And there are different things that companies can actually do to protect some of these trade secrets like Boston Beer Company's twisted tea recipe, for example.
A non compete isn't the only tool to protect that.
Where you can do.
[00:25:30] Speaker B: Let me clear it up, pond water and vodka. Done.
Sue me, your company.
[00:25:45] Speaker A: But what can happen is if someone does, there are nondisclosure agreements that they can put in place and non solicit agreements where you couldn't sell the recipe or use that knowledge to help prevent. But you could still get a job working with another company in the industry. But if they were to release something that was identical, then they could come after you violating your nondisclosure. So it still gives the employee freedom, but protects the company.
Also, Star references a 2023 study he co authored on the effects of the Washington state law that invalidated non compete agreements for employees earning less than $100,000 annually.
What happened when that law went into effect is rather than bump up worker salaries to just above the six figure threshold to keep them eligible for their non competes, firms decided nondisclosures and non solicitation agreements were just as powerful and still gave them the freedom to go out and chase better pay opportunities.
So they kept their salaries there and then made them sign these other agreements and got rid of the non competes. And everyone was the better.
[00:27:19] Speaker B: Arguably. Well, I guess. Actually, no.
The people got their salaries they were looking for.
But your point is well taken. There are other ways if you're really looking to protect your trade secrets. Although, again, I'm skeptical of any trade secret that Boston Beer company has other than what makes a can of twisted tea work as a bludgeting weapon.
That's an interesting.
[00:27:51] Speaker A: Um. And they then end the article with an excerpt from Quench your own thirst business lessons learned over a beer, too, from Jim Coke, the founder of Boston Beer Company.
What if you spend all that time and money training people and they leave? He asked me. On the face of it, the question makes sense, but I told the distributor he needed to think of it this way. What if you don't train people and they stay? Isn't that worse? Well, Boston Beer company, listen to your own fucking advice.
[00:28:30] Speaker B: Does he actually run anymore, or is he just kind of there, just kind of wandering the halls?
[00:28:35] Speaker A: Like, I think he basically just shows up for the commercials and he's like, fuck, what do we make again?
[00:28:44] Speaker B: Just walking around with a pint of sad m's going, what are all these people doing here? All right, buddy.
[00:28:53] Speaker A: But moral of the story, it's so crazy that an industry basically built on anti corporatism does one of the most corporate things with non competes and to really, in a time of stagnation and slowing of growth in the craft beer industry, any company doing this needs to get rid of it. Let's let the market grow. Let's let people move around and really just kind of kickstart that fire passion and get craft beer moving in the right direction again.
[00:29:30] Speaker B: Absolutely.
[00:29:33] Speaker A: Jeremy, what do we got?
[00:29:35] Speaker B: Come on, Hayes Bros. Fight me news. Now. I don't think this is actually news, but I.
[00:29:40] Speaker A: You sound like me.
[00:29:43] Speaker B: I did notice something interesting in this article from the San Francisco Chronicle by Esther Mobley. Esther points out that hazy ipas are everywhere. I don't know if you've heard of them. Tyler.
[00:29:55] Speaker A: No, never heard of them.
[00:29:57] Speaker B: I got one of these hazy ipas and I'm going to drink it. While reading this article, which is going to become very ironic in a second, she points out that they are everywhere with a kind of breathless exasperation that makes me sort of smile and go, oh, you must be new here. Well, welcome. Can I get you a beer? But it's true. I first realized that the style was well and truly out of control on my last visit to Portland. Back in 2019, I managed to drag my wife to four breweries, which is quite a feat, by the way.
[00:30:30] Speaker A: About five more than she wanted to.
[00:30:32] Speaker B: Go to, pretty much. Great notion, ecliptic breakside, and I can't remember what the other one is right now. I was thumbing through my pictures, but I couldn't find them. But all of them. All of them had multiple hazy ipas. In fact, IPA, in one form or another, was sometimes the only thing on the menu, with the exception of a lager or two.
And great notion. Great notion. Also had a smattering of, like dessert.
[00:30:57] Speaker A: Stouts, pastry stouts, slushy sours, sampling trays.
[00:31:02] Speaker B: Which in years past featured samples of varying bitterness across the SRM spectrum, was just monochrome and turbid yellow. The article noted that in 2018, 1.5% of all craft beer was classified as a hazy IPA. 2023 it was 7%, which is quite a jump for a style that in its most coveted forms, costs. This one retails at five eightync.
[00:31:34] Speaker A: I'm pretty sure I got my fucking beer cheaper than that for a 16 ounce can.
[00:31:39] Speaker B: She goes into the history of the style and what makes it different from a normal IPA? I'm not going to do that because I feel like it's been well documented on this podcast, and I think our core audience probably has a pretty good grasp of it. But if you don't stop by the Google it bitch. The part of this article that did amuse me was not the preponderance of Hazy IPAs, or even that the craft beer nerds and brewers are sort of sick of them. It was this nugget from the article quote. They've become so popular, in fact, that hazy ipas are likely to induce groans among some craft beer nerds. Multiple brewers have told me that they're sick of Hazy's, then asked me not to print that.
No one wants to bite the hand it feeds them, it seems to which I thought, holy shit, they're afraid of Hays Bros.
[00:32:34] Speaker A: When haysbrows pay your mortgage, you would be too.
[00:32:38] Speaker B: Listen, it's one thing to reluctantly made reluctant a word like that or something to make against your will, sort of, kind of to make hazy ipas. If you're running a business, you make what the people want. And if the people wants water squeezed from the mop used to clean the Tropicana bottling plant, then that's what you got to do.
You might argue with the merits of the style, but it's hard to argue with empty kegs and the dollars flowing into the cash register.
I understand the reason why a lot of these breweries have five different hazies on draft that all roughly taste like a fruit bowl dropped into a pile of lawn clippings. It's because that people will buy every single one of them and talk about how they all taste exactly the same. I can't fault that.
[00:33:25] Speaker A: Literally, you could just brew the same beer every time and put a different label on it, and they're going to fucking defecate themselves trying to get it.
[00:33:34] Speaker B: But afraid to put their name to a quote saying that one is tired of a style that has completely saturated the brewery scene? Like the fuck do they people? What do they think is going to happen if they let slip that they think hazy ipas take like a mango farmer's sweatsock? Are they going to be inundated with dazed, beardy white guys who wear stocking caps in fucking July, raising their be flanneled fists in outrage?
Is the relationship of their clientele so perilous the mere suggesting that there are in existence beer styles that don't taste like a diabetic tangerine's blood sample might leave the tap room completely empty as everyone has a massive collective existential collapse. Is this industry honestly being held hostage at, forced at the gunpoint of public opinion to relentlessly produce and reproduce and reproduce the same beer that looks and smells like the dregs. Of a ziploc baggie of prison hooch.
I don't know.
[00:34:37] Speaker A: I'm here for all the analogies of hazy IPA.
I'm trying to see how many you got, so keep going. I got three more.
[00:34:46] Speaker B: I got three more because I've decided.
[00:34:49] Speaker A: That I'm not afraid to channel my inner southern baptist.
[00:34:55] Speaker B: I'm not afraid of the Hayes bros. All right? And I'm going to make it clear right now. Hazy IPA tastes like the kind of candy you would use to placate a three year old. Assuming that three year old instantly trasmogrified into a 30 year old with a lumberjack fetish, hazy IPA is what you would get if you went to a deranged psychotic and said, make me something that tastes like your mind.
Hazy ipas taste like a mandarin oranges suicide note.
Send your comments to
[email protected] you can also leave a comment on our facebook page. Come at me, Hays bros.
[00:35:39] Speaker A: You turbid motherfuckers.
[00:35:48] Speaker B: That felt.
And now I'm going to drink my hazy IPA.
[00:35:53] Speaker A: Normally, I'm the one who gets on a soapbox about something like that. So that's why you like getting me riled up. It was really refreshing.
[00:36:02] Speaker B: Isn't it fun to see it from that angle?
[00:36:05] Speaker A: Oh, it is.
Except you didn't have enough blood vessels popping in your forehead.
[00:36:11] Speaker B: The thing is, I'm not really angry about hazy ipas. I don't drink a lot of hazy ipa. Well, I drink a lot of hazy ipas because I taste them for work. But if I'm out and about, I don't tend to drink them because.
[00:36:28] Speaker A: That.
[00:36:28] Speaker B: Was a lot of fun. And we'll see if again, let's pick a fight. Let's do this.
Tyler, what do you got for us?
[00:36:40] Speaker A: Well, Jeremy, what goes better with a beer than a shot of liquor?
[00:36:48] Speaker B: Let's see.
Busty redhead.
[00:36:53] Speaker A: Well, okay, you got me there.
Yeah, but a shot of liquor is less likely to stab you in your sleep.
[00:37:01] Speaker B: This is an easier to get a hold of, too.
[00:37:06] Speaker A: But this is an article from tasting table. That is the twelve popular beer and a shot drinks from around the world. So I figured let's take a walk down degenerate lane and see.
[00:37:21] Speaker B: I've always wondered about the people who have a beer and a shot at the same time because there's something about, okay, here's my drinking booze and here's my getting fucked up fast booze. I need to do the fucked up fast booze. And then I'm going to do the drinking booze, and I'm going to do, like, three of the fast boozes, and then I'm going to fall down on the floor as God intended.
[00:37:42] Speaker A: I can't complain.
For work, I recently partnered with one of the liquor reps, and we're doing a beer and shot special with one of our beers, one of their liquors, and it's a shot of whiskey and a pint of our beer, and it's boosted sales for us. So I ain't going to fuck with it, like, take my name off that quote.
[00:38:05] Speaker B: Thankfully, there's no record of it.
[00:38:11] Speaker A: For the worldwide one, it is the good old fashioned boiler maker, also known as the club sandwich in many parts of the midwest.
[00:38:25] Speaker B: Only in the worst. Who calls it that?
[00:38:28] Speaker A: I don't know, but I kind of want to start calling it the club sandwich. I dig the name. All right, it's a whiskey shot and a pint of beer. It's the chameleon. And if you've ever been to a bar and seen one of these degenerates, Jeremy and I are talking about ourselves included sometimes.
[00:38:50] Speaker B: I mean, if you haven't, you know, if you haven't, what are you doing with your mean? Have you not been to a dive bar?
[00:38:59] Speaker A: So we're going to go to Japan next for the sake bombs.
[00:39:06] Speaker B: I mean, sake is not really liquor.
It tops out at, like, 20%.
[00:39:12] Speaker A: Okay, but it's still technically a shot. All right, it didn't say liquor.
[00:39:20] Speaker B: All right, fair enough.
[00:39:23] Speaker A: Which I got obliterated one night on sake bombs in downtown.
[00:39:33] Speaker B: Boy. Where were you drinking sake bombs in downtown Boise.
[00:39:37] Speaker A: So we hit, like, four other bars, and then my budy's like, you want to go do a sake bomb? I was like, I've never done a sake bomb. He's like, let's go down to Ramapong. When Ramapong was still a thing. We did, like, four or five sake bombs, and then we continued on with our night, which was a bad idea, because pregaming sockey bombs and then doing sockey bombs and then going out for more drinks just really made the night blurry.
[00:40:10] Speaker B: Pre child life was fun, wasn't it?
[00:40:13] Speaker A: Oh, it was. So if you're unfamiliar, you put a shot of sake on top of a pair of chopsticks on a glass of beer, you pound the table so the chopsticks slide out, the sake shot falls down in, and you slam.
Ew. It's pretty fun.
[00:40:34] Speaker B: Okay.
[00:40:37] Speaker A: Next up, we're going to Scandinavia, and.
[00:40:44] Speaker B: What do these sick motherfuckers come.
[00:40:45] Speaker A: Up with aquavit and a beer chaser.
[00:40:51] Speaker B: Why would you pour cologne in your goddamn beer? What is wrong with you viking motherfuckers?
[00:40:57] Speaker A: I had no clue what aquavit was.
[00:40:59] Speaker B: I have no idea what it is. No.
[00:41:03] Speaker A: So.
Particularly in Denmark, enjoying aquavit with a meal is a beloved tradition. It's a flavored scandinavian spirit typically infused with caraway, dill, or coriander.
It holds the title of the national drink of Scandinavia, and it's enjoyed during festive vacations like midsummer or Christmas.
It's typically served along some hearty dishes such as pickled herring and meatballs.
It helps aid in digestion after helps.
[00:41:42] Speaker B: Cover up this flavor of those two things with something even slightly less repulsive.
[00:41:49] Speaker A: However, recently the scandinavian youth have discovered an inventive, more quick and effective way to enjoy the national treasure. Instead of food in between each sip, the aquavit is paired with a beer as a refreshing and aromatic taster. Usually a light lager pilsner helps cleanse the palates between sips of this liquor, enhancing the overall drinking experience.
[00:42:24] Speaker B: I guess my argument would be, I think that drink could be instantly improved by removing the aquavit. But I don't know, maybe I'd like it.
Some of those bitter digestive drinks are starting to grow on me. Maybe it's an old age thing. It's an old man.
[00:42:48] Speaker A: The closest I could think is like, how in craft beer, undebergs have become all the rage you do.
[00:42:54] Speaker B: A shot at Unabbergund is still repulsive.
[00:42:56] Speaker A: That is not a. I'm sure that is repulsive. If you drink it so you can eat pickled herring. Like.
[00:43:11] Speaker B: Really complements the flavor. Yeah, that's not a good thing for either of those.
[00:43:15] Speaker A: Yeah. So next we're going to Korea with.
I don't know.
[00:43:25] Speaker B: So nice to hear you try to pronounce things really anything. I mean, Korean is the least of your worries.
[00:43:33] Speaker A: I should think so.
Apparently, this is the korean drinking ritual that epitomizes that the strongest bonds are forged over shared laughter and spilled drinks. It involves dropping a shot of any liquor into a glass field with beer, creating a fizzy explosion of flavor and a story to tell.
[00:43:57] Speaker B: Don't even fucking care. They're just, like, just anything and anything. Those sick motherfuckers. Drop some tequila in.
Yeah.
A friend of mine. I don't know what the same thing exists in Korea, but a friend of mine brought back some liquor from China, and I shit you not that it tasted like a laundry basket and not a fresh one.
[00:44:26] Speaker A: It does say, for an authentic experience, try it with soju, a clear distilled spirit from rice and grains.
It's one of Korea's most popular beverages and insanely affordable. So I'm assuming it doesn't taste good.
[00:44:45] Speaker B: Affordable does not usually translate into delicious.
[00:44:50] Speaker A: Next, we're going to the city of brotherly love. Unless you root against their team, Philadelphia.
[00:44:58] Speaker B: Let me guess what theirs is. You take a beer and then you punch somebody in the mouth, and then whatever blood and teeth fall into the beer. That's what you drink.
[00:45:08] Speaker A: Close. So if you pay the $5 toll to cross the Franklin Bridge, you can walk into almost any pub, slap $4 on the bar, and ask for the citywide special.
It's a Philly favorite that was created at Bob and Barbara's lounge that consists of a shot of Jim beam and a can of paps blue ribbon. It was originally named the special, but other bars caught onto the trend and started adopting it, so it became the citywide special.
And apparently you walk into any bar and ask for the citywide special, and they'll hand you a shot of Jim beam and a.
[00:45:51] Speaker B: My two things. Number one, part of me wants to try this. The other part is Philadelphia is exactly the kind of city that would just tell the rest of the world this, so that every once in a while someone comes into a bar and does this. They laugh, beat the shit out of them, rob them blind, throw them out into the street.
[00:46:10] Speaker A: Yeah, that checks out.
You're not wrong.
[00:46:19] Speaker B: I'll wait. You try it first, Tyler.
[00:46:25] Speaker A: I'll see if I can find someone who lives over in Philly and find out if this is actually a real thing.
Next, we're going to Russia for.
[00:46:41] Speaker B: They where they take a beer, realize that they don't have any beer. They throw the glass away and just drink vodka until they stop, until they drink so much, they don't realize they're in Russia anymore.
[00:46:54] Speaker A: Close.
So it is a Moscow tradition that you down a large beer with a heavy pour of vodka?
[00:47:07] Speaker B: Yes.
[00:47:08] Speaker A: So you mix the beer with a lot of vodka? Apparently, yeah.
[00:47:13] Speaker B: It makes the beer go further. They are very economical people. Very pragmatic, the Russians.
[00:47:21] Speaker A: Next, we're going to the UK, and it's the snake bite.
[00:47:26] Speaker B: Okay, that one. I actually knew the snake bite. I actually had a long discussion about what this is, so settle an argument for me. What is a snake bite?
[00:47:36] Speaker A: Well, first of all, it is actually banned in the UK.
[00:47:41] Speaker B: What?
[00:47:43] Speaker A: It's not outright illegal, but it's banned in so many pubs because of its ability to just get you fucked up. Really? It's basically the Brits version of a four loco.
[00:47:58] Speaker B: All right. Then it's much different than I think I've been led to believe. What is a snake bite?
[00:48:05] Speaker A: So you take a half part of lager and a half part of cider. Okay.
[00:48:10] Speaker B: That's exactly what I thought it was.
[00:48:11] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:48:12] Speaker B: How does that get you fucked up?
[00:48:14] Speaker A: Because it's light.
Because it's light, refreshing, and so people just. And it's slightly sweet. So you want to drink more. You're just slamming, slamming, slamming.
[00:48:27] Speaker B: And the British lack that inherent barrier against self annihilation that you and I take for granted.
[00:48:36] Speaker A: Just a slight barrier of self preservation that we have. They don't. And they're like, I need 20 of these.
[00:48:45] Speaker B: Listen, you're talking about a country that had to have that moved their elections from a weekend to a weekday for the express purpose, so that more people would show up to vote sober.
[00:49:01] Speaker A: Their.
[00:49:02] Speaker B: Preselection for fucking themselves up so great that the choice needed to be removed from them.
[00:49:13] Speaker A: So the next one is in France. I don't quite count it. So I'm just going to kind of brush over it real quick.
It's a shot of orange flavor contru with Red Bull called the Skittles bomb.
[00:49:30] Speaker B: Okay, that's not beer.
[00:49:32] Speaker A: Yeah. So skipping over that.
[00:49:34] Speaker B: The orange liquor in a four locos.
[00:49:42] Speaker A: Next up, California with the corona sunrise.
I hate it already, so thank the tequila sunrise.
It's a cocktail made with tequila, orange juice, and grenadine. But instead of orange juice, you put a corona extra. So it's tequila, corona, and grenadine.
[00:50:11] Speaker B: I love tequila. I really do. I really enjoy it. The thing is, it does not play well with others when you're drinking tequila. You should not have other things.
He needs his space. Okay.
[00:50:31] Speaker A: Yeah.
Next we're going to go to Ireland.
Jeremy, would you like to guess?
[00:50:40] Speaker B: Oh, let me think here.
Well, if it's an irish car bomb, I'll tell you. No, do not do that in an irish pub.
[00:50:53] Speaker A: No, I know that. I knew a guy.
I was at a fraternity conference, and a guy was like, yeah, I was in Ireland this summer, and I ordered an irish car bomb. And the bartender looked at me and said, we don't have any of those. But we got a 911, poured two shots of 151 and lit them on fire. And I was like, oh, damn, that.
[00:51:21] Speaker B: Must be a joke.
Because the same thing happened to a friend of mine. Basically that same story, although it was just two big shotgun. He didn't light it on fire, but it was like, that's a twin towers, your motherfucker.
[00:51:34] Speaker A: So this is the Dublin drop. So it's a Dublin stout and cream, irish cream in the bottom of a shot glass, layer, Jameson on top. Drop it into a shot of Guinness and chug it.
[00:51:52] Speaker B: No, because that's going to make the irish cream curdle. And I disagree with that. That is fucking wrong.
[00:52:03] Speaker A: Fair enough.
[00:52:05] Speaker B: Listen, I realized immediately that any drinks that will cause things to curdle are an abomination and should be refused. That is not correct.
[00:52:20] Speaker A: Next we have Jesus spaghetti.
[00:52:24] Speaker B: We've talked about this one. We've talked about this one, haven't we not?
[00:52:28] Speaker A: Yes, we have. This is for Italy. So the spaghetti, if you don't remember, is aperol. A shot of aperol lemon juice and a Miller high life.
And the final one, I also don't count because it's the Jaeger bomb with Jaegermeister and fucking Red Bull. And was like, that's not fucking.
[00:53:00] Speaker B: Mean. I guess you're going to count the french one then.
[00:53:07] Speaker A: I didn't count the french one.
[00:53:09] Speaker B: Fair enough.
[00:53:12] Speaker A: Jeremy, take us home.
[00:53:14] Speaker B: Oh, we're not going home anytime soon.
We're going to a bad place. Tyler, I think it's fair to say that we love beer here. Like, a lot to the point of obsession, maybe. So it is in that spirit that I asked Tyler, have you ever wanted to fuck a beer?
No, sorry, I didn't mean to be so. All right, that was a little bit crude. Let me just. Doesn't have to be so rawn exploitative. It can be loving, like, you take the beer out, just, I don't know, out restaurant would be best. Definitely not to a brewery.
You just start a fight there, getting excited about all the new, younger beers out.
Go out for a nice evening, have a nice dinner, go home, maybe open.
[00:54:07] Speaker A: Up the can, make sure they're kind of cold, take them for a little romp in the car, open up the.
[00:54:14] Speaker B: Can and you know what?
[00:54:17] Speaker A: Speed down the highway.
[00:54:20] Speaker B: I don't probably precipitate an embarrassing medical emergency at this point, but I'm proud to say that if you're so deep into craft beer that it's morphed into a beer can fetish, well, I have found the solution for you. As long as there's no questions about what I was looking at when I found this, okay?
[00:54:39] Speaker A: That was the first thing, honestly, when I saw you post this on our facebook page, I was like, what the fuck has he been looking at? That this popped up or this was his targeted ad?
[00:54:57] Speaker B: This popped up in my newsfeed, and that's my story, and I'm sticking to it.
Now.
That probably still doesn't say anything good about me, other than it has beer in the name, so he will enjoy this. It has beer in the name, and it's fucked up.
This comes from Vice, and it was written by Mary Francis Knapp. I don't normally read stories verbatim. I like to ingest the information and explain it my own odiferous way. But in this case, the opening paragraph is so wonderfully written that why mess with perfection?
[00:55:34] Speaker A: Quote, oh, I can't wait for this.
[00:55:36] Speaker B: Love beer. Of course you do. You're a patriotic, cord eating child of Christ. Your unwavering passion for the pint deserves to be reciprocated, which is why we're hosting this virtual ribbon cutting for shag's luscious lager, the first ever fuckable beer can.
That's right, folks. There is now a beer shaped male masturbator for the novelty sex toy collector, small brewery supporters, and people who want to get a leg up on their white elephant gift shopping the beer can.
[00:56:12] Speaker A: How much is this? Because you might be getting a Christmas gift.
[00:56:17] Speaker B: The beer can, which already graces our Instagram feed, as Tyler hinted, and will surely be the COVID for this podcast episode, features the script reminiscent of Schlitz, which was always vaguely suggestive. I mean, just say it. Schlitz. Come on, baby. You want to come to place for a bit of Schlitz? That's grounds for fucking sexual harassment. Anywho, it looks like a beer can with that signature script and inside it features, and I'm not making this shit up, four internal pleasure chambers named the arise chambers, the apex chamber, the squeeze chamber, and the exceed chamber.
[00:57:03] Speaker A: They really missed a chance here. Not calling it, like, the mash ton, the boil kettle, the fermenter, and the bright tank.
[00:57:16] Speaker B: I don't think it's targeted for brewers. I think it's just anybody who just. Well, anybody who needs to fuck something.
And no humans are present and needs that thing to be a beer can for whatever reason. I just thought it was a very male thing. For the chamber that is designed to, quote, get you over the finish line every time, is called the exceed chamber. Yes, you have fulfilled your biological requirement into a piece of silicon that looks like a beer can. A way to exceed expectations.
[00:57:54] Speaker A: Our ancestors would fucking kill themselves.
[00:57:58] Speaker B: Just a little window into the frail mayo eagle male ego right there. Yeah, I exceeded.
Anyway, it retails for 33 95. If you have a beer can collection and wish to hide your fucked toys and playing sight. Go for it. Or don't just be all, yes, that's the beer. Can I fuck?
[00:58:29] Speaker A: It's going to be an expensive gag gift flash forward because I want to buy it for one of my coworkers and just not tell them what it is.
[00:58:43] Speaker B: Just wait till they have to open it in front of. I don't know. Would they open it in front of the company or in front of their family?
[00:58:49] Speaker A: Probably company white elephants.
[00:58:54] Speaker B: Just like, just looking at.
They just look at that and they look directly at you.
[00:59:03] Speaker A: Actually, on my work, I'd probably be third or fourth. Some.
[00:59:09] Speaker B: Unless they're aware of this podcast, in which case your suspicions just went up.
[00:59:16] Speaker A: I'd still probably be.
[00:59:21] Speaker B: But there you go.
Something to get you to the finish line. Tyler, do you have anything else for us?
[00:59:30] Speaker A: I don't.
[00:59:31] Speaker B: All right, well, this has been.
[00:59:33] Speaker A: It's all beer.
[00:59:34] Speaker B: Hayes bros, come fight me. You can do so on our
[email protected].
[00:59:42] Speaker A: Or call the sex toy company and ask them why they made a lager. Not a hazy ipa for you to fuck.
[00:59:50] Speaker B: Coming. Slap a hazy ipa label on it.
[00:59:55] Speaker A: Coming soon in more ways than one.
[01:00:00] Speaker B: You can check out our Instagram feed, Facebook feed, and if you're so inclined, you can leave us a review on Facebook or places where you get podcasts, I think.
And, yeah, that'll be quite enough from us. I'm Jeremy Jones.
[01:00:19] Speaker A: I'm Tyler Zimmerman.
[01:00:21] Speaker B: I'm going to have a beer.
[01:00:22] Speaker A: Have fun.
[01:00:23] Speaker B: I'm going to fuck a beer.
[01:00:24] Speaker A: You, God help you.
Close.
